Tonight I’m tangled in my blanket of clouds.
Things just wont do without you, matter of fact.
I’m on your back.
If you walk out on me, I’m walking after you.
Letting go of something is among the hardest (read: “heart”est) things one can do. Whether it is a possession, dream, hope, or love; we all make strong mental and emotional attachments to that which we desire. Giving up on or letting go of such desires cause a breakdown of the utmost importance. Learning to cope with these breakdowns is, in fact, one of the human race’s most profound accomplishments.
Some cope better than others. There are many different methods in dealing, and the success rates vary. There are those who futilely do their best to hang on to what they lost, and in turn, never truly let go. Others will convince themselves that what they had wasn’t important enough to mourn the loss of in the first place, while, others still, will begin to mourn their loss, and then too quickly find something new and shiny to placate their desire.
I am guilty of attempting all of these methods during my times of loss. The older I get, however, the more I realize that IT IS OKAY TO BE SAD AND HEARTBROKEN. Feeling a deep loss is part of our human experience. It allows us to reflect, learn and grow. It is perfectly fine for us to spend time mourning that which we have lost (or could never have), until we are ready to want something else. I fear that those who utilize the aforementioned ways of dealing, will not learn from their errors, and will be doomed to repeat them.
Another heart is cracked, in two, I’m on your back
One reply on “Walking After You”
We can remember them and acknowledge the loss, whether it’s been two years or a decade. It can be as simple as a note, a card, or even a phone call around the anniversary of the death, letting them know that you’re remembering their loved one and you’re thinking of them. If you have a sweet memory of the deceased or something special that always reminds you of them, share it. It will bring a smile at a time tinged with sadness.What if you want to do something more tangible? You can make a donation in their memory to their school, a library, a food bank, community nonprofit, or any organization that you feel is appropriate. Ask that an acknowledgement be made to a family member, or, just make a donation in their name because it feels good to honor their memory.Your thoughtfulness and memories will not make the day or week more painful to family members; they’re already keenly feeling their loss. But your kindness might warm their heart. It helps to know that while their loved one is gone, their lives mattered, and we haven’t forgotten.